June 4, 2011

New Parenting Book Offers Insight on Marriage, Parenting and Life from A Dad’s Point-of-View

Here's the press release for my FIRST Book, with more info and details, below (and a great review posted on Amazon at the bottom of this post):

CALABASAS, Calif., June 2, 2011 — Newly released parenting book A Dad’s Point-of-View: We ARE Half the Equation takes on tough parenting and other issues with wit and humor, challenging you to be the best parent you can be. From raising teenagers to second marriages and family and faith, author Bruce Sallan (http://www.BruceSallan.com) dispels many of the current-day parenting myths and provides practical tips for parenting and marital success.

Taking the best of his columns, A Dad’s Point-of-View (published in over 100 newspapers and websites), about life as a single divorced dad now remarried, Sallan brings it all together in the one parenting and relationship book that readers will totally connect to and catch themselves saying, “I’m right there with you, Bruce!” In fact, many will be turning to it again and again as they face the challenges of raising today’s youths.

And for the thousands of Sallan fans, it truly delivers. Not only is it receiving very positive feedback, but it is has received numerous stellar reviews including one from Stan Lee, Marvel Comics, creator of Spiderman, The Fantastic Four and X-men. Lee states, “Bruce’s fascinating look at the ups and downs of parenting reminds me of Marvel Comics. There too, we choose not to hide the blemishes of life, but to discuss them in an entertaining and helpful manner. Must reading for all parents and would-be parents.”

Sallan’s goal with the book is simple. “It’s my hope that families of all faiths and circumstances will enjoy it and benefit from it as they face the many challenges of parenting. Through my own stories and experiences, I share from the heart about raising my sons, surviving after a divorce, adding a new step-parent to the mix, and how to have more joy in the small things, such as family traditions.”

A Dad’s Point-of-View: We ARE Half the Equation (ISBN # 978-0-9833166-0-2) is published by JuneDavid Publishing and sells for $19.95 at leading bookstores including Amazon or through the author’s website, http://www.BruceSallan.com. For media interviews, contact publicist Diana Ennen at (954) 971-4025 or Diana@virtualwordpublishing.com.

Sallan was recently chosen as the #5 Dad Blogger among the top 50 Daddy Bloggers on Cision, one of the leading global providers of media relations. Get his book now just in time for Father’s Day, for the dad in your life, the mom who can also use a few parenting tips, or for yourself. It’s the gift that will be enjoyed year after year.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here's just a partial list of the places carrying the above release:

My FAVORITE thing we've done for the book is my 17-year-old son's Music Video - Hard to believe he did this for me -- wrote, performed and produced it ALL!

Get the book in Kindle or book form at Amazon or, at iTunes, or BN.com, for the best deal, get it at "The Store" at BruceSallan.com where you'll receive its companion poster (folded - see below) for free:

A Limited Edition (500) of this poster (mailed in a tube) is also available.

Also, please join our growing and wonderful #aDadsPov TweetChat, every Thursday from 6:00 - 7:00 p.m., PST. This week's topic is, "Parental Hypocrisy."

I LOVE this review by @azmomofmanyhats

"I had the pleasure of meeting Bruce Sallan through the wonderful world of social media. As a result, I have become familiar with his website, radio show, and his book. I was fortunate to have received copy of his book, "A Dad's Point of View," just after its release. I am very impressed with the work. Bruce comes from a standpoint that is opposite mine from a gender standpoint as a mother, yet the things he addresses are universal concerns of parents, whether they are mom or dad. Through some humor, sarcasm, and straight talk, Bruce confronts the challenges of raising children and marriage in today's complicated world. He presents a "real world" look at the things that are the concerns of his family, and probably most families in general, from a person that is living the challenges and navigating them day to day. From dating to driving, hypocrisy to happiness, toddlers to teenagers, fun to frustration, Bruce opens up his life as an example of what Dads (and moms) face in the raising of children.

"A Dad's Point of View" is a pleasure to read in it's conversational, short story style. Bruce's personality and writing style create a literary experience that shows the difficulties that Dads face in raising children. However, the experience is not limited to understanding dads. The topics he addresses show that although approaches to the mechanics of parenting may differ, the heart of a parent whether dad or mom, is the same. I'd recommend this as reading for both dads and moms to better understand the roles and challenges of the fathers in children's lives, as well as a place to find similarity and unity in our shared roles as parents."

December 29, 2010

Snowed In! And, an "Urban Legend" (or not?)

There's an urban legend about a buried jeep that supposedly happened here, last year*

I'm up in Mammoth, California for a week's ski vacation with my wife and son. Got two great days of skiing before a huge storm almost literally has trapped us. The two photos below give you an idea of what it's like here.

For me, it just means more time to write. I'm polishing the first draft of my book, which I expect to have out in time for Father's Day, and I've written a couple more of my "A Dad's Point-of-View" columns, to get ahead. I'm going on an extended cruise to Hong Kong, Borneo, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, and the Philippines beginning in late January so I like to get ahead. Actually, I like to be ahead most of the time anyway. I was always that kind of kid in school. I never liked all-nighters, even in college. I preferred not having the hassle of worry or last minute rushing in school and I feel the same now with my writing.

So, being "trapped" by the snow only disappoints me that I don't get to ski which I thoroughly love. Otherwise, it's kinda cool. Watching the elements outside is wild, really, and you get a "picture" of it by these two photos. One is the pathway from our condo and you can see a few vehicles in the background. The other is a closer shot of said vehicles. That is just the snow from last night until this afternoon! They say they had "World Record" snow here last week. I believe it!

This is amazing for less than a day of snowing...look at the wiper blades sticking out of the cars!

This is amazing! Almost looks like a sculpture, doesn't it?

That's almost a knee-deep pathway...see the cars and trucks in the background!

This is the same view as above, a day later, with the sun now shining and it's been a "little" clear - car still buriend in snow in the background!

Taken on our way home yesterday, January 1, 2011!

*So, the story goes something like this...some sort of illicit affair was going on and the couple were "going at it" in a car, during a very cold spell, with the heat running. As a storm hit, the car was getting covered in snow and the exhaust got stopped up, but they were "busy." Naturally, keeping the car running meant the exhaust fumes went into the car. The illicit lovers were later found, "in the act," and very dead, when their car was dug out several days later...someone please play "The Twilight Zone" theme now...

December 14, 2010

Are You In the Holiday Spirit Yet?

My 14-year-old son said he wasn't feeling in the holiday spirit yet? Are you kidding me?

Everywhere we go we hear Christmas music. We play it non-stop in the car, whether it's the Xmas channel on XM radio, my own XM Radio Show Special, or our own Holiday CD that we sent out a decade ago.

Plus, I just made this video, a slide-show, to go with the decade old Sallan Boys sing-a-long we did to The Drifter's version of "White Christmas" and he says he's not in the mood?

Gimme a break?! My wife goes with him to buy a Christmas tree. He complains and bellyaches about getting the lights around it - a regular scrooge, but she perseveres and then gets it fully decorated. He likes that part...lol.

Then, my wife wraps ALL the presents and it's really gorgeous. I still act grumpy 'cause I'm Jewish and I still struggle having a tree in the house, period. But, it's beautiful and it makes her happy so, as they say, "Happy Wife, Happy Life." As for my son, if he's not in the spirit by now, I guess he'll just have to wait till Christmas Eve or Day!

November 17, 2010

Is There a Difference Between Being Passionate and Being a Pest?

I was a producer and executive in showbiz for a quarter century. I had a pretty good run. If you "google" me or look me up on Wikipedia or IMDB you can see what I've done. Lasting that long doesn't happen my accident unless you're very persistent and passionate, or have serious family connections. My family connection consisted of my dad, who was a dental technician, having made Joan Blondell's dentures (seriously). I'm sure the majority of you reading this haven't a clue who she was!

Just for a little proof of my former life in show bix, here's a favorite photo of mine "back in the day" with a very young me and a much younger Brooke Shields.

Anyway, I worked mostly in television, and mostly in the mostly lost and dying form of television movies, which was an honorable and good business once. Back in the days of just 3 networks, on Sundays, they each aired competing "Movies of the Week" and there were a couple dozen small companies that competed to supply and produce those movies. I worked in that world.

My success was in the selling and developing end of it and later in the producing end as well. I was damn good at it, using whatever means I could to "sell." Those included selling a movie with ONE WORD after playing tennis with head of movies at CBS (and letting him win), bringing a baby black-spotted leopard to a pitch at NBC, and bringing two WWF wrestlers in full wrestling garb to ABC, putting the ABC Exec in a "hold" and leaving with the parting words, "Buy it or we're outta here." It all worked. I also really believed in what I sold, was really passionate about it, so what I sold I came from the heart and worked at a higher success rate maybe due to that honesty and passion.

When I later joined the world of blogging, and now added Radio Show host to my resume, I brought some of this sort of showmanship and most certainly my passion to the party, but mostly I brought my "never say die" or, more appropriately, "never take no for an answer" approach to things.

But, I found very quickly that friends and family really didn't give a hoot about looking at my writing, let alone making a comment or hitting a "like" button. Some "fans" would do anything I asked, but I would feel bad going back to that well too often. With Twitter I did and do put out requests or invitations to visit a blog, listen to a show, or more recently visit my new website (created with partners Linda Sherman and Ray J. Gordon), BoomerTechTalk.com, but I struggle with the rejection or lack of response I often receive. When my 14-year-old son created a comic strip, "It's a Tech World After All," for BoomerTechTalk.com, I thought well this time, I'm promoting my kid, not myself, and at least it isn't as blatantly self-serving as it seems when I ask "you" to visit or support something of mine or, gulp. please leave a comment. And, in fact, the e-mails, tweets, and blogs about his comic have gotten better reception.

But, bottom line, I still don't get it. When I receive such requests, I do one of a few things depending on how busy I am or the mood I'm in at that moment. I go ahead and visit it, and comment or not, if I like whatever it is. I ignore the request. I delete it without even looking at it if I don't like or care about the sender. But, regardless, it's a big "so what" as to bothering me. It's no bother. It's up to me to respond or not. When I send out such a request, I'm overly solicitous and NEVER ask the people I send it to reply to me. IF you have a moment, IF you feel like it, IF you want, please take a look is my tone. So, what's the deal? What am I missing?

How else do we build our audience? How else do we help our kids? And, how else would I have gotten a worldwide audience and now a growing nationwide radio show presence in just six months (without such thick skin)?

AAARRRGGGHHH!!! I'm venting, but I'm laughing too. But, I am passionate (and sort of a pest)!

October 13, 2010

BoomerTechTalk.com -- THE Answer to Our Tech Fears and Worries!

For some of us, “of a certain age/generation,” every new tech thing is yet another time we can get flummoxed and frustrated. How often have you opened that new tech device, camera, digital picture frame, or new “smart” phone, and felt anything but “smart?” I sometimes put the “thing” aside, stare at it a few days, and then finally get the courage to open it up.

BoomerTechTalk.com

What often follows, more often that I’d like to admit, is something doesn’t work right. Even learning the so-called simple things, like attaching and sending a photo via e-mail can sometimes be confusing. My favorite is when the only help you can get is online, but you can’t get online because of some connection problem. Or better, when you take their suggestion to call them for help before you return the darn thing.

Call them? Are you kidding me? Do you really want to be connected to someone who doesn’t speak English all that well, in a far-away time zone. That’s, of course, after you’ve gone through the voice-menu options, and typed in your life story, which when you finally do get someone on the line asks you for all that information again! ARGH!

I decided we (of that “certain age”) needed some help, so I’m very proud to tell you about a new web-site I created, with my partners Linda Sherman Gordon and Ray Gordon, called “BoomerTechTalk.com” (aka BTT). Linda is a prominent Social Media Marketing Consultant who helped take me from tech-boob to almost tech-geek. Ray Gordon is a brilliant designer, photographer, and true “Renaissance Man.”

Linda Sherman (@LindaSherman), Bruce Sallan (@BruceSallan) and Ray J Gordon (@RayJGordon) - BTT partners.

We realized something was missing out there in Internet land, so we created a place that our generation could go to for technology help in simple-to-understand language. It’s for you; it’s for me, and it’s for those of us that are parents so we won’t fall completely behind our kids. Please check it out. I really believe this will be of value to boomers everywhere, and older and younger people, that struggle with the basics of much of our constantly changing technology.

BoomerTechTalk understands that it’s important to stay relevant and connected to our fast-changing world. I t’s for parents who want to keep up with their kids. It’s for adults who want to get their parents to keep up with them. It’s for anyone who is open and willing to learn.

My 14-year-old son created a comic strip for BTT called, “It’s a Tech World After All,” which this biased and proud dad thinks is terrific. It’s in the “Family” tab.

Now, let’s start learning. First thing, open that digital camera you’ve had sitting on your desk the past few weeks. Buy that new cell-phone and learn how to text. Don’t be afraid.

BoomerTechTalk.com - Please visit this new website to ease your tech struggles! You can follow BTT on Twitter @BoomerTechTalk.

October 8, 2010

A Proud Dad Crows About His Son!

Check out his latest "It's a Tech World After All" - Comics: Numbers Six, Seven, Eight, and Nine!" - Please leave Aaron a comment and encourage his work!

Update - Stan "The Man" Lee of Marvel Comics comments on Aaron's first comic strip on BoomerTechTalk! Check it out!

Update - Here's Aaron's latest comic strip (he keeps getting better and better!):

I am so proud of my just turned 14-year-old son, Aaron Sallan, for creating, writing, and drawing the new comic strip, "It's a Tech World, After All," for BoomerTechTalk.

(Note/Request: Who can help us get some papers to carry this cutting edge, and so timely, comic strip? Yeah, I'm biased, but it's fun, it's so relevant given the success of the Facebook movie ("The Social Network"), and what a great Oprah/Ellen-like story of a 14-year-old creating, writiing, and drawing such a relevant comic strip!)

Here are the first four:

He's working on the next two. I've seen the storyboards and they're just getting better and better!

Please visit BoomerTechTalk and enjoy this wonderful, new, and very needed website. I'm as biased about BTT as I am about my son, as I'm one of the founders and creators of BooomerTechTalk...lol.

BoomerTechTalk

October 6, 2010

Why the #140conf LA (on Social Media) Was SO Terrific!

(For a video of part of my talk, about "Giving Back to the World," go to this link...thanks to Ray Gordon for the great job of filming and editing -- so quickly, so well, so Thank You, Ray!)

This past Monday and Tuesday (October 4,5), I attended a fantastic conference oriented to people who use Twitter, work in Social Media, teach, want to learn and grow, and so much more. I also got to speak and my topic was (surprise surprise), "Dads Are Parents, Too."

There were dozens of incredible speakers (see the full list at the end of this blog) and panels that was all organized and created by Jeff Pulver (@jeffpulver) with assistance from the tireless (mom of three, I might add) Melissa Pierse (@melissapierce).

Chamillionaire, Bruce, and Jeff Pulver

The information offered by the amazing diversity of speakers was overwhelming and completely inspiring! I was busy on my computer, taking notes, tweeting about it, while others, worldwide, were watching in via a “live video stream.”

BUT, the common denominator of Jeff’s conferences, in this man’s opinion, is what we can do to help out! What we can do via the incredible power of Twitter, Facebook, and other Social Media resources to “repair the world,” as I like to phrase it.

Krupali (@krupali), as she likes to be called (an Oncologist), shared her stories of helping give dying patients a special wish. She’s an angel, as Jeff has often called her.

Kevin Pollack (@kevinpollack), actor & comedian, brought the house down with his “interview” about how he’s used social media to reach new audiences.

Kevin Pollack (photos courtesy of Lucy Rendler-Kaplan)

Andy Grammer (@andygrammer), Chamillionair (@chamillionaire), Ilene Chaiken (@ilenechaiken), Jason Pollock (@Jason_Pollock), Kenna (@OKKenna), Nick Cannon (@NickCannon), Angela Shelton (@angelashelton), Eric “CandyMan” Nash (@onelovecandyman), and Michelle Branch (@michellebranch) and so many other artists discussed their use of Twitter and Social Media to reach new audiences and help do some good.

Chamillionaire (photo courtesy of Lucy Rendler-Kaplan)

Michelle Branch (photo courtesy of Lucy Rendler-Kaplan)

Andy Grammer (photo courtesy of Lucy Rendler-Kaplan)

Other speakers covered literally everything from real estate, food trucks (really!), to the paucity of dad bloggers (me - more on my talk later). There was Bob Watson (@TopBrokerOC) leading a panel on real estate. Other panels were on moms working at home and another was on sneakers! Yeah, sneakers! And, it was cool (a whole world I had no idea existed). Jeff told me that his sons have become mini-Jeff-entrepreneurs in the sneakers world! Who knew?

(Photo by Linda Sherman)

My friend Julie Spira (@JulieSpira), a frequent guest on my Radio Show, talked about the perils of online dating and was totally unfazed by a technical glitch when her PowerPoint that went with her talk didn’t work. Pros everywhere.

Linda Sherman (@LindaSherman) and Ray Gordon (@RayJGordon), my partners in BoomerTechTalk (@BoomerTechTalk), which we launched during the conference, flew in from Kauai after many sleepless and delirious nights getting the website ready, so they could be at #!40conf LA and to hear my talk and take photos and video of me. Now, how's that for partners!?

BoomerTechTalk

Logo designed by Ray Gordon

Ray_helping_with_the_projector_while_bruce_is_speaking

My BoomerTechTalk partner Ray Gordon making sure all the tech works for my "talk" (Photo by Linda Sherman)

Julie Spira (@JulieSpira), and my BoomerTechTalk partners, Ray J. Gordon and Linda Sherman (photo by me)

I know I’m going to leave off someone, so please check the whole list below! Some of the other fantastic talks were given by Jessica Gottlieb (@JessicaGottlieb), Stacey Soleil (@staceysoliel), Lisa Steadman (@LisaSteadman), Johnny Diggs (@JohnnyDiggz), Mark Horvath (@hardlynormal), a great spokesman for the homeless, and Robert Moran (@RobertMoranLA).

One of the many terrific panels! (photo courtesy of Lucy Rendler-Kaplan)

My talk was about how few dads are represented in Social Media, blogging, and in the MSM (Main Stream Media) altogether! I referenced the recent Newsweek cover story about men, called "Man Up," and discussed how SAHD's (Stay-At-Home-Dads) are still horribly outnumberd by SAHMs (Stay-At-Home-Moms). Newsweek claims certain statistics and I asked the audience what they thought the percentage of SAHMs were in comparison to SAHDs. I got back anywhere from 70-80%, as the number of SAHMs from the audience. Newsweek declares, based on how the men describel themselves, that the percentage has hovered at slightly less than 3% (SAHDs) for the past few years!

WHAT? I called out the dads/men to step up and said that was my mission and goal with my "A Dad's Point-of-View" columns, blogs (here and elsewhere), and my Radio Show.

Then, I spoke about my wonderful interaction with "The Africa Zebras," a group of girls in Africa and how I befriended them and that led to my writing about them and doing a Radio Show about them. That all led to many people, in addition to my family, sending books, toys, and other things to them - ALL via Social Media - and I declared it a blessing and our duty to "repair the world." I believe in this with all my heart and soul!

A_dads_point-of-view_reading_club_in_ghana_8x10_edited

I just received, today, the photo below from my friends in Ghana - don't you love it?

This is the first step towards their library!

Frankly, my head is still spinning as my feeble hard-drive of a brain is trying to process all the wonderful ideas and inspirations disseminated non-stop over the past two days.

Social Media is a force. The #140conf emphasized how it can be a force for doing GOOD, as well as doing business. Get aboard…Now!

Here’s the full list of speakers:

Aaron Ray (@redbaron1200s) - Partner & Head of Digital, The Collective, Abdul Khan (@ImHungryinLA) - Co-founder, Verso Entertainment,  Adam Bell (@datatv) - Web Design and Branding with an attitude!,  Adam Rifkin (@AdamRifkin) - Writer / Director, LOOK,  Adam Zbar (@Tap11) - CEO, Tap11,  Ali Cobrin (@AliCobrin) - Actress,  Alison Kramer (@nummiesbras) - Owner of Nummies Nursing Bras,  Andrew Lih (@fuzheado) - Author of The Wikipedia Revolution; journalism prof, dir of new media at USC Annenberg; China tech commentator,  Andy Grammer (@andygrammer) - Music Artist,  Angela Shelton (@angelashelton) - Performer Writer Storyteller Filmmaker Teacher Artist,  Anne Driscoll (@mrs_driscoll) - Vice President of Business Operations, Ning,  Aparna Vashisht-Rota (@ApsatParentella),  Barry Schuler (@BSchuler) - former CEO of AOL, Ex Producer of LOOK, Managing Director DFJ Growth Fund,  Bob Watson (@TopBrokerOC) - CA Real Estate Broker,  Brad Wyman (@bradwyman) - Producer, Look,  Brandon Litman (@onedayonearth) - Executive Producer, One Day on Earth,  Brittany Laughlin (@bLocks8) - Co-Founder, Gtrot,  Bruce Sallan (@BruceSallan and www.BruceSallan.com) - I’m a former showbiz guy who writes a dad’s column,  Carlos R Hernandez (@CarlosHernandez) - Social media educator & co-creator of Social Media for the Uncomfortable,  CarmenElena Mitchell (@therealgirls) - Creator, “The Real Girls Guide to Everything Else” Web Series,  Cash Warren (@cash_warren) - producer, entrepreneur, president of Verso Entertainment,  Cathy Brooks (@CathyBrooks) - Strategic Communications Coach,  Cathy Dahn (@GastronomyBlog) - Food Blogger, Cathy DeBuono (@cathydebuono) - Actress, Producer, Psychotherapist,  Chamillionaire (@chamillionaire) - Artist,  Christopher Boucher (@princeboucher),  Ciaran Blumenfeld (@momfluential) - Owner Francie Pants & Producer Momfluential Media,  Clinton Schaff (@clintschaff) - USC Online Communities Industry Faculity,  Cynthia Lou (@CynthiaAnnLou) - Designer, Writer, Web & Brand Strategist,  Dan Gillmor (@dangillmor) - A life in media — music, newspapers, online, books, investing and education,  David Wild (@Wildaboutmusic) - TV Writer, Rolling Stone Contributing Editor, Huff Po Blogger, author `He Is . . . I Say’,  Debra Eckerling (@WriteOnOnline) - Bringing Community to Writers around the World,  Dennis Carpenter (@About55) - Founder & CEO, About55,  Derrick N Ashong (@ashong) - musician, artist, activist, and entrepreneur,  Donna DeDario (@StarlightOnline) - Director of Corporate Partnerships & Communications, Starlight Children’s Foundation,  Dr. Greenstein (@DRG) - Chief Brainiac at bodies in motion and Neuroleader/CEO of The GGI,  Eric “CandyMan” Nash (@onelovecandyman) - Street Performer: Artist, Dancer, Actor,  Eric Weaver (@Weave) - Director of Digital Strategy, Tribal DDB,  Erik Oberholtzer (@TenderGreens) - Chefs at Tender Greens, garden to table, sustainable cuisine,  Evan Seinfeld (@EvanSeinfeldXXX) - ead Singer/Bassist for Biohazard, CEO RockStarPornStar,  Fran Marchello (@franalations) - Shoe Connoisseur, Vlogger, Blogger, Part Owner of dTb,  George Ruiz (@georgeruiz) - Head of New Media, Senior Vice-President Business Affairs at ICM,  Gerry Campbell (@gfcampbell) - CEO, Collecta,  Gram Ponante (@gramponante) - Editor of Gramponante.com,  Greg Grunberg (@greggrunberg) - American television actor,  Greg Johnson - SVP, Executive Creative Director & Head of Digital, William Morris Agency,  Hank Wasiak (@hankwasiak) - Author. TV Host. Teacher. Partner - The Concept Farm,  Ilene Chaiken (@ilenechaiken) - co-creator, writer and executive producer of the television series The L Word,  Imal Wagner (@imalwagner) - PR for #140conf LA & book authors,  Jacqueline Walker (@HomeSeekers) - Real Estate Consultant,  Jason Pollock (@Jason_Pollock) - Filmmaker, Writer, and Activist,  Jeff Fowle (@JeffFowle) - Owner-Operator / President, KK Bar Ranch & AgChat Foundation,  Jeff Keni Pulver (@jeffpulver) - founder, curator #140conf,  Jennifer Cisney (@kodakCB) - Kodak’s Chief Blogger & Social Media Manager,  Jessica Gottlieb (@JessicaGottlieb) - Wife, Mom, Blogger,  Jill Bennett (@DailyJill) - Actress, Vlogger,  Joe Fernandez (@JoeFernandez) - founder, Klout,  Johanna Blakley (@Mojojohanna) - Arts, entertainment & media researcher based at USC Annenberg School’s Norman Lear Center,  Johnny Diggz (@JohnnyDiggz) - Chief Technology Evangelist, Tropo.com,  Jon Lansner (@jonlan) - Columnist/blogger for O.C. Register,  Julie Cole (@juliecole) - VP, Mabel’s Labels,  Julie Spira (@JulieSpira) - Online dating expert; Author,  Julie Steelman (@JulieSteelman) - Entrepreneur’s Selling Expert,  Kelly O’Neil (@KellyONeil) - author of Visionary Women Inspiring the World: 12 Paths to Personal Power,  Kelly Shibari (@KellyShibari) - CEO, Hourglass8 Media,  Kenna (@OKKenna) - Music Artist,  Kerianne Mellott (@Keri_Mellott),  Kevin Pollak (@kevinpollak) - Actor, Comedian,  Khayyam Wakil (@iamkhayyam) - Strategist, Designer, Wordsmith, Comedian, Krupali Tejura, M.D. (@krupali),  Kyle Ruddick (@onedayonearth) - One Day on Earth Project Founder and Director,  Leyla Farah (@CausePR) - Founding Partner, Cause+Effect, Inc.,  Lisa Dabbs (@teachingwthsoul) - former California school administrator, education consultant,  Lisa Steadman (@LisaSteadman) - Best selling author, relationship coach, and owner of Woohoo, Inc.,  Lisa Tenner (@lisatenner) - Founder, Tenner & Associates, Inc.,  Lori Mackey (@LoriMackey) - author of Money Mama , inventor and speaker,  Luke Renner (@firesideint) - Founder & President, Fireside International,  Mark Horvath (@hardlynormal) - Founder, Invisiblepeople.tv,  Martin Beck (@latimesbeck) - Editor of Reader Engagement, Los Angeles Times,  Matt Bennett (@MattBennett) - Actor,  Melissa Pierce (@melissapierce) - Creator of Life In Perpetual Beta,  Michael Bellavia (@animaxent) - President, Animax,  Michele Meiche (@michelemeiche) - Conscious Media Producer, AwakeningsRadio,Writer,Yoga,  Michelle Branch (@michellebranch) - Music Artist,  Mike Harkey (@mharkey) - Managing Director, ImageShack Corporation,  Nastassia Johnson (@manilamachine) - L.A.’s First Filipino Food Truck,  Natalie Lent (@natalielent) - Director, Emerging Platforms, ID PR, Nelson de Witt (@dewittn) - Chief Story Teller,  Nick Cannon (@NickCannon) - American Actor, Comedian, Rapper, and Television Personality,  Ori Bengal (@CouchSurfingOri) - Adventurer, Photographer & Author,  Owen JJ Stone (@Ohdoctah) - President of Inquiring Mindz Media (IQMZ),  Pete Housley (@petehousley) - CEO, NaughtyTweetNetwork,  Phil Hulett (@philhulett) - Co-Host of LA’s Morning News on KFWB, Anaheim Ducks PA Announcer, Voiceover Artist,  Ray Prock Jr. (@RayLinDairy),  Ree Cee (@colagrand) - President, Urban Supremacy,  Renee Kische (@bestLAliving) - CA Real Estate Broker, EcoBroker,  Rick Bakas (@RickBakas) - Wine, Food, Branding, Dir. of Social Media at @StSupery winery, certified sommelier, author of Quick Bites,  Rishi Khaitan (@itsrishi) - Product Manager for Realtime Search, Google,  Robert Hernandez (@webjournalist) - @USCAnnenberg MacGyvering Web journalism solutions. Co-founder of #wjchat,  Robert Moran (@RobertMoranLA) - Cal State Fullerton journalism student. Avid social media user and LA transit rider who HAS AUTISM,  Sarah Kay Hoffman (@sarahkayhoffman) - “A digitally-addicted country girl,”  Sarah Ross (@sarah_ross) - Katalyst Media, Head of Digital,  Scott Perry (@tipsheet) - founder, New Music Tipsheet,  Scott Schang (@scottschang) - Branch Manager, Broadview Mortgage Corp.,  Sharon Hinnendael (@SharonHinnendae) - Actress,  Shuki Lehavi (@slehavi) - founder, Gumiyo,  Smokey Bear (@smokey_bear) - Only YOU can prevent Wildfires,  Sol Lipman (@thesolster) - co-founder, 12Seconds.tv,  Stacey Soleil (@staceysoleil) - Moderator; Long time Autism awareness advocate, Owner/CEO of Soleil Marketing Services,  Stefanie Michaels (@adventuregirl) - Renowned travel author, speaker,  Steve Franklin (@SEF4PRES) - Teacher,  Sylvia Martinez (@smartinez) - President of Generation Yes,  Tanya Roscorla (@reportertanya) - Education reporter and writer, Tia Dobi (@TiaDobi) - Copywriter,  Tim Kring (@TimKring) - Screenwriter and Television Producer,  Tina Moore (@tmoorepr),  Traci Dinwiddie (@GrooveGoddess) - Actress,  Veronica Lazalde (@verolaza) , Ward Landis (@ShoeWolf) - President. Shoe Wolf,  Willow Brugh (@willowbl00) - Director, Jigsaw Renaissance Seattle, WA,  Zac Sanford (@zacsanford) - VP Development, Suntaur Entertainment; #scriptchat

October 6, 2010

This Week on The Bruce Sallan Show - A Dad's Point-of-View - My Word IS My Bond!

Update: Excellent show today (don't I always say that?). Listen to the re-broadcast tonight at 9:00 p.m. or Saturday at noon or listen, anytime, anywhere, on my web-site.

This Thursday at 11:00 a.m., on "The Bruce Sallan Show -- A Dad's Point-of-View" we will be discussing, "My Word Is My Bond," based on my current column (found at the bottom of this post).

Thank YOU, my sponsors, North Pier Fiduciary Management, Shelley's Stereo, The Wright Centre for Orthodontics (805 68-SMILE), and BoomerTechTalk! (my newest sponsor)

BoomerTechTalk

This edition of "The Bruce Sallan Show - A Dad's Point-of-View" will air "live" on Thursday, October 7 at 11:00 a.m. - noon, PST on KZSB AM1290 or you can listen to it on your computer via a "live stream" on my web-site "Radio Show" page. Archived shows are available to listen to or download anytime! It is repeated Thursday evenings at 9:00 p.m. and again on Saturdays, at noon, PST.

If you'd like to call in when we're "live" on Thursday, listeners in the 805 area code can call (805) 564-1290 on Thursday from 11:06 a.m. - 11:55 a.m. PST. Listeners outside the 805 area code can call toll-free at (866) 564-1290 on Thursday from 11:06 a.m. - 11:55 a.m. PST. Or, you can send e-mails, ahead of time, or during the broadcast to: bruce@brucesallan.com. I will be happy to respond to your Tweets as well, if I can, during the show - just send them to: @BruceSallan.

This week's guests are Wayne Levine (BetterMen.org) for "The Men's Room" and filling in for Julie Spira, but not doing her segment "Single Parent Dating," and Pastor Drew Sams (Calvary Church) for "The "Teen Rap."

While it is not necessary to read my column to discuss the topic or enjoy the show, here it is if you'd like to read it:

A Dad’s Point-of-View, by Bruce Sallan

My Word Is My Bond

Do you remember the old phrases, “He is as good as his word,” or “My word is my bond,” or “A handshake is all I need (in the way of a deal)?” Do you remember when we didn’t think lawyers were the first people we had to call before we made a deal? Do you remember when a contract was just a page or two? Do you remember when your friends returned your phone calls promptly and a RSVP meant something?

What happened? What happened to someone following through on a commitment of “Yes” or “I’ll get back to you?” or “I’ll be there.” I fear our children will have fewer of these kinds of business or personal encounters. The irony is that we have much faster and easier methods of communication yet all it seems to have done is to make life more complicated and less trustworthy.

I don’t like this change. Not one bit. And, frankly, I still rail against it, and expect better of my friends and those I work with. I know that having expectations usually only leads to being let down, but I can’t help still hoping that people will behave as I try to do--with a sense of honor, follow through, and respect.

My former work life should have taught be well not to have these expectations since showbiz is notorious for its flakes and deal breaking. But, I never got used to it. Late in my showbiz career, a good friend betrayed me, and it really broke my heart in a way from which I never fully recovered or regained my enthusiasm for working in the entertainment business. I left that business shortly thereafter. As with so many things that seem bad at the time, I look back at that incident as a positive life change, though it didn’t feel like it at the time.

Now I am better at minimizing my expectations in launching my second career as a writer and, more recently, as a radio show host. To get my column launched, I sent out thousands of e-mail messages addressed to specific editors, publishers, webmasters, and others in charge at newspapers and websites across the country and, later, around the world (only in English speaking countries).

Yet, I still had modest expectations that some small, but reasonable percentage of the recipients of my e-mail messages might take the time to read some of the samples I sent and respond. Maybe they’d say, “Thanks, but no thanks” or, better yet, maybe they’d say, “Love your writing; we must have it.”

I got about a 2% response rate and about a ½% “we’d like to have your column” response. That comes out to one out of every 200 e-mail messages I sent led to my column being carried by a newspaper or website. The first of these, I might add, was The Santa Barbara News Press when Arthur Von Wiesenberger, one of its publishers, sent me a wonderfully warm e-mail response offering my first “official” job as a columnist at a paper.

But, one out of 200! You need thick skin to take that kind of rejection. To be clear, that meant that 196 out of the 200 e-mail messages that I sent were either not read, deleted, or rejected as spam--who knows?

The other thing that puzzles me occurs in my personal life and also relates to e-mail messages. As my mind and interests are varied, I used to like to share a variety of links, music, photos, jokes, and such with my friends. Over time, it became clear that most preferred not to be bothered. This is yet another puzzling change in human intercourse.

My more recent experience in trying to secure sponsors for my radio show was the straw that broke this camel’s back. Naturally, the first places I sought sponsors were with friends in businesses that I thought would be a good fit with my show and audience.

However, as I’ve stated earlier, the methods of doing business seem to have changed. I got lots of encouragement, lots of “I’m interested,” and ultimately lots of “I’ll get back to you” with few actually getting back to me at all. These weren’t strangers that I sent unsolicited e-mail message to but, rather, people I worked with, I hired and paid for their services, and in some cases considered friends. And they, too, were not being up-front and honest.

Why wouldn’t they just say “No?” I followed up several times until it became clear that they were unable or unwilling to give me that “No” as if ignoring my request could possibly be better? Or, as my wife has suggested and is probably right, they just had other priorities in their lives and would get to it on their schedule, not mine. And, that is the lesson for me to learn and to pass on to my boys.

My boys will live, work, and play in this different world where common courtesy often is the exception, but if they understand “the game” they will be better prepared and less disappointed. Business will still get done and friends will still be friends. . They will eventually enter and have to learn to deal with this “brave new world” in which business and personal affairs are conducted in such a haphazard and unprofessional manner.

But, I still don’t like it.

September 29, 2010

Is there a Difference Between a Blog, a Column, or an Article?

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Is there a difference between a blog, column, or article? I fervently believe so, though I've read nothing about it (not that it hasn't been written). As a fan of the #blogchat TweetChat, which is all about the world of blogging, I often find myself thinking about these definitions. I assert each form of writing is quite different and has its own distinctions. I write all three and am quite aware of their differences (to me). Let's start backwards with the blog.

I love this one!

To me, when I blog, I follow these general rules. I keep the length between 250 - 500 words. I care less about perfect sentence structure, even grammar, though I always try to spell-check. Again, for me, I like my blogs to be funny whenever relevant. I use colloquial language. I might even swear though generally I avoid that given my "brand" as a parenting writer and radio show host. And, most of all, I have fun. Blogging isn't work for me. For examples of my blogs, just read some of the "Just A Guy" blogs I used to write for momlogic. There are other samples of blogs there as well.

Moving up the food chain, what is a column then? A column is longer, 750 - 1250 words. It has story structure, a beginning, middle, and end. A theme is set up, developed, and paid off. I pay special attention to spelling, grammar, and even have the AP Style book to use as reference, which I'd never consider using for a blog. For my "A Dad's Point-of-View" weekly columns, I have an editor who gives me feedback, is anal about correct use of English, and offers me a wonderful sounding board for improvement as well as catching mistakes that otherwise I wouldn't really care about as much in my blogs. It takes more time and effort to write my columns. Check them out, for examples, on the "My Columns" page of my web-site.

Finally, what is an article? An article usually involves research. It is again, even longer generally, than a column with a range of 1,200 - 2,000+ words. Often there will be sources I will cite as with my "The State of Gender Affairs" article. It takes more care and thought. I will put it aside and revisit it, whereas with most of my blogs, I can write them in one sitting. I write fewer articles because it takes more effort and work and I'm basically a lazy guy. Writing an article requires more discipline. I don't like discipline. Also, since most writing these days goes unpaid, I'd rather not put in that extra diligence without compensation. One of my favorite articles was, "The State of Gender Affairs," as an example.

But, I'm a writer and I yearn to improve and grow, so I do write articles, too. My most recent one was for Romance University where I was a "guest professor" and wrote, "One Man's Story of Giving Back (to the world)." I tend to be more proud of my articles as my internal pride is often measured in relation to the amount of work I've put out. BTW, please comment on "One Man's Story" if you'd care to as I'd greatly appreciate it (comment there, that is).

These are MY definitions of a blog, a column, and an article. I welcome your thoughts?

My next big writing venture is MY BOOK and that will be a whole new set of disciplines, lots more work, and serious research and editorial help/review!

Ahhh, the blank page (or screen) -- getting that first word out sometimes is all we need to start the flow of ideas and creativity!

September 28, 2010

This Week on "The Bruce Sallan Show: A Dad's Point-of-View" - R E S P E C T !!

Update - Great show today. Listen to it anytime, anywhere, right here. Pastor Drew and Julie Spira were really terrific.

This Thursday at 11:00 a.m., on "The Bruce Sallan Show -- A Dad's Point-of-View" we will be discussing "R E S P E C T -- Find Out What It Means to Me." The show and column is about whether respect still exists in the home, between parent and child, in both directions. Has it gone the way of shame and mostly disappeared?

Click to view large

Thank YOU, my sponsors, North Pier Fiduciary Management, Shelley's Stereo, and The Wright Centre for Orthodontics (805 68-SMILE)!

This edition of "The Bruce Sallan Show - A Dad's Point-of-View" will air "live" on Thursday, September 30 at 11:00 a.m. - noon, PST on KZSB AM1290 or you can listen to it on your computer via a "live stream" on my web-site "Radio Show" page. Archived shows are available to listen to or download anytime! It is repeated Thursday evenings at 9:00 p.m. and again on Saturdays, at noon, PST.

If you'd like to call in when we're "live" on Thursday, listeners in the 805 area code can call (805) 564-1290 on Thursday from 11:06 a.m. - 11:55 a.m. PST. Listeners outside the 805 area code can call toll-free at (866) 564-1290 on Thursday from 11:06 a.m. - 11:55 a.m. PST. Or, you can send e-mails, ahead of time, or during the broadcast to: bruce@brucesallan.com. I will be happy to respond to your Tweets as well, if I can, during the show - just send them to: @BruceSallan.

This week's guests are Pastor Drew Sams (Calvary Church) for "The Men's Room" and "Teen Rap," and Julie Spira (CyberDatingExpert.com) for "Single Parent Dating."

While it is not necessary to read my column to discuss the topic or enjoy the show, here it is if you'd like to read it:

A Dad's Point-of-View, by Bruce Sallan

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find Out What It Means to Me

Respect. Isn’t that really all parents want from their kids? Isn’t it about the hardest thing to actually teach them to do--treat us with respect? I struggle with this a great deal due to the way my two teenage boys sometimes speak to me, respond to a request, and generally behave. It is not with much respect, at times, and I don’t like it.

Aretha had the biggest hit with her rendition of “Respect” though it was originally performed by Otis Redding in 1965 (here’s a link to a great video of her performing it in 1968). Some of the lyrics to that classic song resonant for me on this topic: “All I’m askin’ for is a little respect…”

So, what is the solution? I think it may be in our demands and expectations of our kids. If we allow them to be disrespectful, we are essentially condoning that behavior. I finally realized that certain things just were no long acceptable between my sons and me and that there had to be serious consequences if they were not being respectful.

I often come back to the inherent parenting dilemma, I believe, of my generation. We want to be our kids’ buddies rather than their parents. Being a buddy means being a friend, and letting a lot of things slide. Being a buddy means not demanding a level of respect that parents have historically been given without much question until the sixties when all “authority” was called into question in some quarters of our country.

Going biblical, we’ve got one of the Ten Commandments that says, “Honor Thy Father and Mother.” What exactly does that mean? A man I greatly respect, Dennis Prager, believes that commandment is the most important of the ten! Why? Everything else comes from that relationship between parent and child. When children “honor” their parents, they learn the tools to live life with grace, respect, and principles.

Dennis Prager does not expect the child of an abusive/bad parents to honor them beyond honoring the institution of parenting. Nor do I. But, in the more common scenario of a healthy father and mother, it is our obligation and duty to literally demand that respect and “honor.” And, frankly, I’ve laid down on that job, partly due to guilt over what they went through in my divorce and also just plain laziness as I, too, like being their buddy.

I know I’m doing them and myself no service by not teaching them to respect my authority which, in turn, will teach them to respect all the authority figures that they will encounter on their journey to adulthood, from teachers to employers. What I’ve allowed them to get away with, as far as respect goes, would cost them better grades, jobs, and/or success at work in “real life.” I am therefore not doing my job of being the best parent I can be.

Today, I made a breakthrough after my younger son questioned my participation in a task I’d asked him to help with, related to our moving. I asked him to join in loading my truck, packing up some of his stuff, and otherwise contributing to our family effort to move. As I had done a lot of the “heavy lifting” already, I expressed that it was my son’s turn. His response was, “Well then, what are you going to do?” The implication being that I wasn’t doing my share.

The fact that he’d slept in till noon that day and most days of the summer while his step-mom and I had been working since early in the mornings, evidently escaped him. The fact that both of us had already done some of our primary work of the day and made a trip to our new home with boxes of our stuff, also escaped him because he was sleeping.

It took me a full day to realize the level of disrespect he was displaying and I was sanctioning by my non-response. I did an inventory of these issues and realized where I was failing as a dad and parent. So, today, I sat him down and explained what I expect of him, what was acceptable, and what were not, and the consequences of another display of this sort of disrespect. He was quiet; he was sullen.

But, he GOT IT! The rest of the day, he was bending over backwards to be helpful. It sunk in. For me, it was hard to be so harsh, or so I thought, but it was what he needed and what our kids often need from us. They need us to teach them about real life, the real world (and I’m not talking some dumb MTV series), so they won’t get fired from that job when they question an apparently waste-of-time task a boss asks of them.

That is my job. That is your job. We had kids; we have a responsibility to teach them respect. Deal with it.